Broken

As I began my job at camp, I physically and mentally prepared myself to deal with difficult campers. Going in, I thought I was prepared. I thought I was ready to deal with the "worst case scenario." I was ready to handle anything that came at me. I was ready to handle the hateful camper, the broken home, the cry baby and even the joyful camper. I was SO sure I was ready.
Going into third session, I was exhausted. After a busy staff weekend including Coldplay and the wedding, I was wiped out. I'll admit, I didn't go in with the right attitude. I hate myself for saying that as I returned to camp on Sunday, I was looking forward to Staff Weekend. Mentally third session was a blow over. God definitely humored himself with my staff placement. Placed in an older cabin, I felt sure that the week would be a breeze. Little did I know that the girls in my cabin, in the camp, would have experienced so much as they have. At 13 years old, these girls have way surpassed what I supposed to be a "worst case scenario." Broken families, broken hearts, and death tore at the girls in my cabin. I so wish that I could have spent more time with the girls than I got to. But from them, I learned a life lesson. Brokenness is a fact of life. We ALL have our stories; we've all struggled; we've all seen/done things that we shouldn't have. These girls are among these. Life has surely dealt them a difficult hand of cards, and it breaks my heart to see these girls return home to these tragedies. In no way did I prepare myself to watch these girls struggle to cope with the things back home. I did my best to constantly encourage the kids in my group, every single one. For every one that I got to know, I learned yet, another heartbreaking story. I can speak for the entire staff when I say that 3rd session, the kids, will forever be engraved upon our hearts. The stories heard, the tears shed, and the kids in general will never be forgotten.
Going on with the brokenness, I have to say that sometimes it is easy to question God, to be angry with him for our struggles. Yet, it isn't God that is tempting us. It's not God, so we shouldn't blame him. I wholeheartedly believe that God cries with us. He gets down by our sides and mourns with us when we face hardships. Through it all, God helps us. What I wanted to leave with my girls, my campers, after this week was that these hardships do not define us. Instead, it is how we learn from them, how we grow.  We will all face our time in the valley. Like it or not, we will all have these things in our lives that have the potential to tear us apart spiritually. Through it all, we cannot let the Devil win this battle. We cannot let him take a foothold, and turn our tragedies into his victory. If you are in a valley, just know that people are here to help you. God will always be there, and in every moment, every struggle, you should always turn to him.

I am broken. We are all broken. Do with your brokenness as you will, but as for me, I will take it, and build myself to be a stronger person.